Not a lot of people know this.

???????? Why the title of this post??
I tend to write a lot about aspects of my life and personal experiences and often it may come across as being very serious and often about overcoming adversity, however life has its many ups and downs and challenges, I thought that today I would share some very little known facts about some of the things that have happened to me, I accept personal responsibility for the events that have occurred in my life over which I have control over, I do not accept responsibility for things that happened to me over which I had no control over.

FACT NUMBER 1.

I have had 4 name changes, my birth name was Paul Derek Berry, in 1980, when I was 16 I changed my surname to Knight, this was my Uncle’s family surname and my maternal Aunt’s married surname.
In 1995, I had moved to Saint Ives in Cornwall, I had no intention of returning to Manchester and was talking with a friend of mine ( female obviously), scribbling names on beer mats, the glass wasn’t sat still long enough to occupy a beer mat, I looked at signatures, handwriting styles etc and came up with Oliver Guisbourne, my name was changed by deed poll, only a few months later I moved back to Manchester.
In 2002, my now ex-wife said that she felt that something was wrong with my name, although she was a Mormon, she professed to have some psychic abilities, here we go again, the deal breaker for her was that I had to correct my name, here we go again, another solicitor another £35.00 and a new name, this time Paul Oliver Guisbourne-Hilton, I actually wanted to keep the Oliver Guisbourne and the surname Hilton was my Grandfathers surname, I once and for all felt happy.

Why is a name important, because it gives you a link to your roots, identifies with your past and in some cases open doors because of the reputation and standing of your ancestors.

FACT NUMBER 2
Polysterene is a wonderful insulator and yet isn’t widely recycled.
Where does this fit into my life, not that I have ever worked with polysterene, I have opened many packages in which polysterene was used for protection, however 1 night I could not find my way back to my hotel in Manchester, I probably suffered from an alcohol induced blackout, one of my clients The University of Manchester had received a number of new computers, they had industrial style refuse bins and had put polysterene in them, you may by now have guessed what happened, that night I slept in one of the bins, it was very warm and comfortable, not as comfortable as my hotel but I was off the street for the night.

FACT NUMBER 3
I have 2 daughters and 1 grand-daughter, I have had a very difficult relationship with them and in-fact 1 of them I haven’t seen in almost half a century, some 50 years.
50 years ago, I was sat with my family solicitor and friend discussing my next appearance in the family courts, my ex-wife had felt very hurt and angry about my actions within our marriage and each month I was up before a family judge to go through my expenses and salary etc, I was presented with the opportunity of putting an end to it by signing my parental rights away, it was at the time a no brainer, I was a high functioning alcoholic who was just as addicted to work.

FACT NUMBER 4

I once appeared on television, it was in the early 80s and a friend of mine at the time was a student at a local college, they were doing a studio debate on How do you see life in the 80’s??
Topics raised by the participants included unemployment, housing, race, hopes, dreams and aspirations for the future, many of the audience were students and the discussion about race was particularly heated, I had only just finished reading a book about apartheid, the divisions that also existed in the UK a few years earlier, whites only barbers, accommodation etc, I don’t profess to be an expert in this field believing that we are all born with an innocence and are moulded by experience, by peer beliefs etc.
Unfortunately some 30+ years later these self same topics exist and are being talked about by many people.

FACT NUMBER 5

I cry – I feel no shame in admitting that I am a hopeless romantic, I cry unreservedly at the saddest of films, Its A Wonderful Life always gets me, a real story of love, devotion, friendship and redemption, I guess that it resonates with elements of my life, friendships are very difficult for me to maintain and I tend to have more acquaintances than friends, love is something that I think we talk about but actually do not really understand, I know that I have told many women that I love them and maybe I believe that I did or do, or was love just a word said because it was something that was expected to be said.
The word Love I believe is a verb, it is a doing word, if you love someone would you want to do everything that you can to help them, I know that my girlfriend who is a taxi driver works 5 long days a week, because I spend more time at home than she does I am quite happy to cook for her, I am quite happy to wash her car, do the washing and hoovering, my reasoning is that because of my love for her I want to make her life as comfortable as I can do, give her some free time and avoid unnecessary stress, the joke is currently that she has the cleanest car in the fleet.

FACT NUMBER 6

I once spent the night in a cell, April 2011 I was arrested on suspicion of assaulting my 4th wife, fortunately no further action was taken and the charge was dropped, what I can say is that it all seemed so unfair when I was held at knifepoint when I was on the verge of leaving her, my step-daughter actually passed her the knife, similar allegations were raised some years later in August 2014 when I finally left my now ex-wife, the best move ever.

FACT NUMBER 7

My Aunt and Uncle once thought that I had drowned, we had visited the seaside town of Blackpool, famous for its tower, illuminations, kiss me quick hats and for me donkey rides.
We went out for a day trip and my sister was with us, my mum used to insist that she came along at certain times, we weren’t close but we tolerated each other, anyway I wanted to go on the donkeys, my Aunt was getting my sister changed, I had already got dressed in my white underpants and vest, every child was wearing them especially on the beach, I was told that I could go on the donkeys after we had been in the sea, I ran into the sea and dropped my beach ball and ran some distance to get on the donkeys, my Auntie saw the ball bobbing up and down and I was nowhere in sight, they looked all over the place, eventually going to the lost children foyer where an announcement was put out on the public address system, anyway it was heard and the donkey keeper sent his daughter to let them know that if it was me that they were looking for I was there with him. I had many free and entertaining donkey rides on that day, helping to feed and water them.

Published by paulguisbournehiltonalifeworthgiving

I am a 56 years old male living for the last 5 years in Pembrokeshire West Wales in the UK. I have entitled this blog along with my Facebook page as A Life worth giving because when I was growing up I was taught that the only way to get on in life was to be selfish, not even sharing sweets, books, pens or anything. I moved into adulthood with very much the same view of life and entered in my teens a life of alcohol dependency, another very selfish trait, my drinking consumed every waking moment and I saw alcohol as both my best friend and worst enemy, the only real positive was that it never let me down. Life changed for me in 1997 in the month of April when I stopped drinking and started to awaken my feelings, I found that I actually enjoyed life, enjoyed feeling although it was hard and left me feeling vulnerable yet today I am at my happiest, in a very loving relationship and life is good. A life worth giving is about my journey through life but also about being selfless and serving others willingly and with an attitude of gratitude.

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