I choose life

Many years ago I was in a really dark place, an abusive and controlling marriage, very little time to myself and every move that I made I felt as if I was being spied upon and monitored. Many times I wondered how and when it would end and yet each and every day I chose to live, I kept on trying to do the best that I could.

Me in 2014

After nearly 12 years of marriage in August 2014, I have a firm belief that God once again intervened in my life, I was given a couple of thousand pounds, not a lot but enough for a train ticket and time to find somewhere to live, I felt that I had to move far enough away from my family and few friends to feel totally safe and I moved to Pembrokeshire on the West Coast of Wales, met someone who I was with for just over 5 years, sadly it didn’t work out but I never give up on the idea of finding love 😀 ❤️. It’s hard sometimes when you don’t really love yourself very much and although I say that I do outwardly I don’t always feel it inside

Last year in Cardiff

Anyway after some hard times, loss and separation and having 💋 a few female 🐸 I found my princess 👸, a year later and we are still going strong and the past are just memories now. Whilst writing this post I am sat on a bench enjoying the sound of birds singing all around me.

Published by paulguisbournehiltonalifeworthgiving

I am a 56 years old male living for the last 5 years in Pembrokeshire West Wales in the UK. I have entitled this blog along with my Facebook page as A Life worth giving because when I was growing up I was taught that the only way to get on in life was to be selfish, not even sharing sweets, books, pens or anything. I moved into adulthood with very much the same view of life and entered in my teens a life of alcohol dependency, another very selfish trait, my drinking consumed every waking moment and I saw alcohol as both my best friend and worst enemy, the only real positive was that it never let me down. Life changed for me in 1997 in the month of April when I stopped drinking and started to awaken my feelings, I found that I actually enjoyed life, enjoyed feeling although it was hard and left me feeling vulnerable yet today I am at my happiest, in a very loving relationship and life is good. A life worth giving is about my journey through life but also about being selfless and serving others willingly and with an attitude of gratitude.

2 thoughts on “I choose life

  1. I totally agree with you, it is quite interesting that the 2 things that I learnt in particular from that marriage is that I had resilience and that if it quacks like a duck then it must be a duck, for some reason I was blinded and didn’t listen to anyone who warned me, there were definitely at least 3 in our marriage. I am also now able to evaluate just what it is that I want out of a relationship, I am fortunate because my girlfriend and I have very similar views and ideals and we certainly don’t have any drama in our relationship.

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